Erika the Stiff

Erika slammed the door open. Ponies stared, then immediately scattered, fearing that the mare was after them.

She waded through the sea of ponies and stiffly got into a barstool, sitting straight as she stared at the bartender with a blank expression.

"I didn't do anything, I swear," the pony said, shying away from her.

"Relax. I'm here for a drink," Erika said flatly.

The ponies stopped. It was so silent, a filly could hear a pin drop.

"The stiff wants a drink!" somepony shouted. The ponies chuckled and went back to their business.

Erika made a mental note to try her target practice on the stallion when he got drunk before she turned back to the counter, her eyes seeming more terrifying by the second.

Shinygear sat at stool a couple away from Erika. He sat there with an empty cup in hoof, and his wooden mask on the counter beside him. He was far from drunk; he planned to keep himself that way. The only reason he kept coming to this place was so he could meet ponies to have a drink with and chat for the night. Other than at, this place was horrible to him. "hm. Guess I'll head home soon..." he said to himself.

The bartender set a small glass on the counter. Erika took a sip and looked up at the pony.

"It's water," she said flatly.

"You asked for a drink," he replied. A few ponies sniggered.

Some said Erika's blank stare was worse than any anger she could have showed. Maybe it was the fact that some ponies thought she was plotting their deaths, but the truth was that the mare felt absolutely nothing. Plotting deaths came with the sadism of non-emotion, but she never really picked a pony to harm.

The bartender's body shook as he avoided her gaze and poured her a beer. He set it in front of her, and she just stared at him, slowly taking a sip and unnerving the stallion to no end.

Shinygear looked over at where everypony seemed to be staring or trotting slowly away from. A guardspony? "Whats wrong with those fools..." Shinygear whispered to himself, referring to the group of ponies either sniggering at what sounded like stupid jokes or starting to head out the door in fear. From what he knew, as long as you stayed off the radar, guardsponies were nice enough. Then again, this place WAS full of low-lives.

Erika's trained ears picked up the pony's grumbles a few stools from her. She turned her gaze on him. Oh, how wrong they all were. To joke about the best guard in the special task force. She blinked and sipped her drink again.

The alcohol didn't have the desired effect on her brain. With no emotions, there was no way to get lustful, blissful, happy, or just plain drunk. Just an annoying buzzing in her head. Her comrades were idiots to recommend drinking. It failed.

Shinygear looked over again, only to realize that she had looked over at him. He slowly looked away again. "Heh...wonder if I did something..." he smiled lightly, thinking of what he could've done. "whatever. I hear the Canterlot prison has good oatmeal..."

Erika abandoned her drink, looking straight into the bartender's eyes as she slowly dropped five bits into the half-empty glass before shoving it back and turning around. 

"What are you looking at?" she asked the pony harshly, enunciating each word with care. "There's nothing to see here."

She stroked her dagger, strapped to the inside of her foreleg, as she surveyed the room.

Shinygear dropped some bits on the counter and slowly trotted out the door. He sat down next to the door outside, smiling. "hm...I guess I'll rest here for a bit..." he said to himself as he closed his eyes.

Kat pursed her lips as she approached the tavern. Being back in Ponyville was bothersome, she preferred being on the sea. But, she had to return for supplies, Ponyville was great for supplies. As she trotted up, she saw a pony sitting outside, sleeping. "What an odd place to sleep." she laughed.

Hypocrite, that was her. For she took naps in the oddest places and at the oddest times. Shrugging, she walked into the tavern and sat next to some unicorn in guard armor. She didn't pay attention to her, she looked weird. Kat was glad she didn't have a bounty on her head..

"Gimme something strong!" she called to the bartender, beaming.

Oh, dear. A happy pony about to get drunk. Erika hated emotion with a burning passion. Hate was one of the few emotions she herself felt, and she hated feeling the hate.

She felt something wet pour over her mane, and the bartender chuckled as her emptied he glass on her head, plucking the bits from her now-drenched mane.

"Thank you kindly, Miss," he said, laughing.

With a sudden movement, Erika was over the counter, her hoof on his chest and her dagger to his neck.

"Never try and mess with a Special Tasks Guard," she snarled. She hated this pony. She hated hate. She hated emotion. She hated feeling anything but joy.

Shinygear woke up once again. "Ugh...I'm going back inside..." he said to himself as he walked in. He sat down at the counter and almost immediately saw the bartender on the ground with the same guardspony from before standing on him.

"Woooaah!" Kat snickered, watching the gaurdpony. Special Task Force? What the buck is that? Without thinking, she drew her katana from its sheath, just in case.

"Hey, you." she called to the guard, "What are you doing?" she still had a bright smile on her face, and her straw hat on her head.

Shinygear noticed that ponies had started taking out their weapons, so he slowly unbuckled his fairly large saddlebag and took out his longbow, just because.

"Watch yourself," she whispered, "or my knife may slip... And don't think my superiors care. They do whatever they can to keep me on board, because if they fire me, nopony in the Guard has a chance of survival. Nopony. Consider yourself warned."

She got to her hooves, using a bit of magic to wash the beer from her mane as she slid her helmet on and leaped over the counter with ease. 

"Carry on," she said, her tone back to it's monotonous ways. "I'd hate to see any of you get caught in a mess. No, I actually don't care. Just mind your own business."

She shouldered past a pirate and another pony before leaving the tavern to sit outside.

((Shiny, there is a posting order. Please post in turn!))

"Eh?" Kat said, tilting her head. Shrugging, she sheathed the sword and sat down at the counter. "Hey, bartender, you all right?" she asked, "'cause I'm hungry!"

Quickly, she ordered herself a plate of fries and a pepperoni pizza.

((alright, I think I got it down now.))

Shinygear kept his longbow next to him on the counter. "That...was crazy." he said to himself, looking out the door. He then looked down at the bartender. "Who the heck do you think you are?" he said.

(okay, the order goes Calla, Shiny, then me. Right?)

Kat laughed, pounding her hoof on the table. "Well this is a fun place! I forgot what Ponyville was like while I was away!" she snickered, then turned to the bartender "Oi! where's my drink?"

((Yep....))

Erika returned inside, but this time, her blue bow was strapped across her midsection, and another dagger tied to the inside of her left foreleg. She sat down, hoping to intimidate others into not pestering her any more. She stared at the bartender, who whimpered and curled up into a ball.

Mari slowly trotted in, not knowing that inside stood three armed ponies. She stood in the door way for a minute or two before turning around about to walk away, but after a few steps she stopped again. "Its going to be fine. After all I heard this was a good place to meet ponies." She said silently to herself, forcing a smile before turning back to the tavern and walking through the doors again. All the other ponies stared at her as she sat down at a table.
"Excuse me, but can I please get something to drink" she asked shyly.

Shinygear ordered a small glass of cider to tide himself over, and put his bow away once again. After the incident with the guardspony and the bartender, he had calmed down a little bit. He noticed a new pony had trotted in, but ignored it for the time being.

Kat looked up at the newpony, but ignored her. Her food and drink arrived, and she demolished it. She stuffed the whole pizza in her mouth and swallowed it. "Mm! Delicious! Another!" she requested, raising her hoof. She grinned at the three ponies sitting close to her, one an emotionless looking guard pony, one a dark colored stallion, and the other an orange-ish mare. Strange group.

Mari made note of the loud pony sitting only a few tables away from her, who was inhaling her food.
"What do you want?" Asked the bar tender, startling Mari.
"Can I please have a glass of water and some french fries?" She asked politely, flashing a nervous smile at the bar tender. As he walked away Mari began to wonder if coming here tonight was the best idea.

(oi, mhjh, there's a posting order. didn't you read the rules?)

((I think shinny's confusing us. Posting order: Calla, Shiny, Butters, MH))

Erika let out an involuntary growl as the mare demolished her plate, loudly asking for another.

She examined the mare again. She had a jolly roger cutie mark, which threw up red flags immediately. Strapped to her sides were katanas. Another red flag.

"Ma'am," Erika asked, turning and staring at her. "May I please have your full name and occupation?"

Shinygear drank his whole cup of cider and continued to ignore everything, until he heard the scraping of a stool and the guardspony getting up. He cranes his neck over.