Bourgeois Sentiments

((PLEASE feel no obligation to respond with a long-butt post like this one))

It was a quiet day at the Canterlot Archival Museum of Equestrian History, a few ponies milled about the clean, white halls, or sat at the leather benches that littered the open areas between works of art and other exhibits. On one such table, a stallion and a mare argued.

"I said no, Ms. Eyes." The stallion pointedly turned away from his companion, sticking his snout haughtily in the air.

The unicorn was of a corpulent stature, white of fur, and golden curly mane. round glasses framed his royal blue eyes, giving him a scholarly vibe. To complete his erudite ensemble, he wore a red bowtie, an argyle sweater vest, and a tweed jacket (with leather elbow patches, as was the style).

"FINE." His companion hissed behind clenched teeth. "Ya know. For a Angel, ya sure aint that good at showin a little of the Harmonious Spirit."

The earth pony's fur was a dark grey, her hair jet black stylishly short. Her eyes covered by reflective aviator shades, Her expressive eyebrows were comically slanted in annoyance. Her accent was particularly Manehattan, matching her slick pinstripe sports coat and blood red tie over a black button down shirt.

"I bid you good day, Ms. Eyes." The stallion said, not turning around.

"Go suck a fat one, Angel." The mare got up and briskly walked out of the gallery.

Ambriel 'Seraph' Principatus took off his glasses and rubbed his temples with his hooves. "Always with the language..." He sighed and in his melancholy attempted to enjoy a Three Kingdoms Era fresco of a battle between a diamond dog horde and a pegasi phallanx.

It was the band's day off.

And Hymn had to wear a disguise. A minor thing, consistent of a mustache, cap and a Highland kilt to hid his Cutie Mark. He had chosen the Art Gallery, and since Canterlot was one, if not "the", oldest City of Equestria, he was sure to find pieces from every era and century.

Well mostly, he understood that most pieces were lost to the recent event with the immortal Chaos Spirit...

His ear twitched at the sound of a fight breaking the silence of the art building. At least it wasn't screaming fans...

Orchid-purple eyes gazed up longingly at a portrait of a particularly pleasant garden. Their pupils wavered and danced with delight as they absorbed the beautiful, rich hues, and marveled at the complex strokes the artist had skillfully used.

"Absolutely adorable! The creativity is just inspiring! Oh, and the accuracy! If only thine own eyes could bare witness to such a luxurious arrangement of flora and fauna, if only thine nose could savor the sensational smells!" Zephyr Botanica exclaimed to no one in particular, nor did she care if anypony overheard. She was enjoying her time at the gallery, much to her own surprise, and nopony was going to ruin it.

Despite her being of the Pegasus breed, the mare was no stranger to Canterlot, nor the higher society of Equestria. Besides being quite wealthy, she had made a decent name for herself through her public gardens and shop- no one knew flowers and other plants as well as her. While many of her species would frown upon her earthly ways, and others would also find her odd, she felt quite at home nestled amongst nature, though she did still cherish the sky. So, as she forced herself free from the painting to instead admire a rather twisted and unique statue of an earth pony posed in mid-reign, she did so with steps of elegance, which bounced the light green locks of hers, and rippled her blue coat. Like most amongst her, the mare was framed by a fashionable purple dress of silk, with crystals that were embroiled upon its end, which sparkled to even the slightest of light.

Her ears perked up and twisted, her pace abruptly halted to the sound of shouting. "My word. What is going on?" Many of the ponies around her were looking about, no doubt wondering the same thing. Concerned more than curious, Zephyr skillfully weaved her way about the crowd, revealing her bloodline agility in the process. While she wished to rush, the mare maintained her collected cool and kept an even trot, being mindful not to scuff her purple crystal shoes. By the time she came across the commotion's source, a mare stood on his own, shaking his head in frustration.

He seemed to recover quickly, but that wasn't going to stop her from ensuring his well-being. Thus, with a smile and a flip of her mane, Zephyr approached, calmly stopping at his side. "Are you alright, my dear? You seem a bit..tense."

"Hm?" Seraph glanced up to see the typical Canterlot mare among a crowd of observers. "O-oh! Do please continue to enjoy the exhibits! No need to stand and gawk!" He nervously showed a majority of the gawkers away, serving to disperse the rest. He sat down again and took a moment to adjust his cuffs, then his collar and bowtie, then his glasses, before letting out a tremendous sigh.

"Are you alright, my dear? You seem a bit..tense."

"Nothing a spot of tea and a good book wont fix, My Dear." He smiled cheerily, and took a moment to notice the remarkably similar lexicon, but shook the thought from his head. "My compatriot just was asking for things that couldn't be done. Not to worry! She will not be a disturbance to your cultural education any longer. She was..." He looked after his earth pony companion, who glanced at him as she opened the door to the streets of Canterlot and flashed an obscene gesture his way.

Seraph deflated slightly and let his impeccable posture slump slightly. "She was just leaving."

Hymn couldn't help but over hear, and his curiosity was peaked.

But in the name of manners and good image, he did not stray from his art seeing nor did he confront the stallion. But he didn't walk away.

He had many "encounters" with mares. Most did not end well, and he understood how it felt to be kicked to the cobble stone.

Her eyes followed the stallion's to a particular mare, whom was just leaving the room. "She sure doesn't seem to be in the best of moods." Zephyr frowned, uncertain whether she should pry more into the situation. On one hoof, she was curious to know what had transpired between the two for such an ending, but on the other, it truly wasn't her business. For a compromise, she decided to ask, "Do you think she'll be alright? I hope whatever happened would not ruin her experience of this magnificent show." She then turned her head more directly towards his, and added, "Nor yours."

While the pegasus wanted to offer a comforting hoof, as was her nature to be caring and kind, she didn't want to possibly embarrass the stallion, or degrade him. Amongst the high society, pride was a large concern. Especially for those of the unicorn race. Putting on her best warming smile, Zephyr extended a wing around him in a friendly manner, and jokingly suggested, "From my personal experience, I've seen many spatters solved with simplistic things such as a lovely bouquet. Now, I'm not suggesting you require one, nor do I know just how close you two are.." The mare paused, grinning further. "But it couldn't hurt!"

She chuckled softly to herself, covering her fair lips with her crystal shoe. It was then that she realized something dire- she had forgotten to introduce herself! "Oh, forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my manners." Zephyr bowed down politely, her lids drawing shut so that her long eyelashes curved upward delicately. "I am Zephyr Botanica." Fluttering her eyes back open, the pegasus straightened her posture, but still maintained her lovely smile. "I apologize if I've intruded too much already."

"From my personal experience, I've seen many spatters solved with simplistic things such as a lovely bouquet. Now, I'm not suggesting you require one, nor do I know just how close you two are.."

"My dear companion would rather see my house burned down than receive a bouquet from me." He chortled pleasantly. "But to be honest, I do appreciate the sentiment. No, She will certainly get over it."

"Oh, forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my manners." Zephyr bowed down politely, her lids drawing shut so that her long eyelashes curved upward delicately. "I am Zephyr Botanica." Fluttering her eyes back open, the pegasus straightened her posture, but still maintained her lovely smile. "I apologize if I've intruded too much already."

Seraph extended a hoof. "A pleasure, Ms. Botanica. Please don't apologize, the fault is mine as much as it is yours. Ambriel Seraph Principatus. And the issue between us is a common one. Our occupations usually, ah, conflict. And she asked for a favor for a project she was looking into, a favor I couldn't provide. I imagine that the locale would also be a tad vexing, she is most... out of her depth in Canterlot. It is nothing a brunch over coffee and tea wouldn't fix."

Hymn really really shouldn't be listening in on their conversation.

Something in his head finally clicked. Ease dropping on somepony's conversation wasn't a way he wanted to spend his free time. It was petty.

When he attempted to leave the two behind, he froze.

Now, he could very well be a good judge of a surface character, at least in his opinion. And any pony could spot a Beat-Bug's fan group from a mile away. Particularly when they have taken upon themselves to plaster Beat-Bugs logos and clothing and decorations all over themselves. Judging by the size, he'd say someone tipped them off.

Just lovely.

So, he did the first thing that came to mind.

He ran behind the unicorn stallion and pegasus mare.

"I'm sorry to do this," he said to the two, "But if you would please keep me hidden so I don't get mobbed, I'll be appreciative."

Normally, he would have kept up the Emerald Isles accent, but he had dropped it in favor of his normal Equusish Scouse. Clearly foreign. He just wasn't doing himself any favors today...

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"My dear companion would rather see my house burned down than receive a bouquet from me." He chortled pleasantly. "But to be honest, I do appreciate the sentiment. No, She will certainly get over it."

To this, she quirked an inquisitive brow. Apparently, their relationship wasn't the warmest she'd seen. Then again, it was quite possible that this was a case of 'love-hate'. She felt a sinister grin tugging at her lips as she thought deeper into the subject. "Oh, I don't know. Beneath all that bite there may be a sweet mare looking for such a gesture. But I digress, I do not know her as well as you." Zephyr bowed politely, conceding. "The offer still stands if you change your mind, though. Or perhaps if you had your heart set on another to woo." The mare winked and chuckled.

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"A pleasure, Ms. Botanica. Please don't apologize, the fault is mine as much as it is yours. Ambriel Seraph Principatus. And the issue between us is a common one. Our occupations usually, ah, conflict. And she asked for a favor for a project she was looking into, a favor I couldn't provide. I imagine that the locale would also be a tad vexing, she is most... out of her depth in Canterlot. It is nothing a brunch over coffee and tea wouldn't fix."

"The pleasure is all mine, good sir." The pegasus gratefully extended a hoof to his own. Intently, she listened to his explanation, her ears politely twisted forward to capture it all. The deeper he delved, the greater her curiosity grew. Rather than intrude upon his privacy, Zephry settled for a simple nod of acknowledgement. "I understand entirely. I wish you and your compatriot the best of luck in your endeavors."

Before she could turn to be on her way, a light blue stallion suddenly appeared behind her, followed by a gushing wind that ruffled her light green mane and gown. She blinked a few times, having been caught off guard by the sudden commotion, and simply stared at the pegasus.

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"I'm sorry to do this," he said to the two, "But if you would please keep me hidden so I don't get mobbed, I'll be appreciative."

Zephyr was well beyond the border of puzzled. "Oh, er, um.." She felt a blush creep to her cheeks- he was certainly a fetching fellow. Realizing her own sense of lust, the mare swallowed hard and turned back towards the painting presented before her, her wings casually spreading their lustrous feathers to hide the stallion in the process. She began commenting on the piece, using the utmost of vocabulary and discretion, making sure to keep her dignity in check while still rather awkwardly providing the favor.

"I'm going to guess that you're someone everypony must know." The pegasus whispered.

Unfazed by the sudden appearance of the star. when the younger stallion jumped behind Botanica and Seraph, the white unicorn nodded neighborly and leaned back, his modest girth covering the windows between Zephyrs feathers, totally obscuring the pony.

After he watched the crowd of fanfillies run off in his perifory he sat up and turned to the Beat-Bug.

"You wouldn't happen to be one of the... oh golly... What's their..." He scratched his snout with his hoof for a brief moment. "Beat-Bugs!" He brightened considerably upon remembering their names. "Old boy, you're all over the news. I'm surprised paparazzi haven't sunk their evil nasty teeth into you yet." He looked around suspiciously. If Canterlot had no lack in anything, its nosy journalists.

"Please, not so loud, someone might hear!" Hymn said to the Unicorn in quite urgency. He cleared his throat, and said more clearly and confidently, "I'm Hymn Hummer, its a pleasure, despite the unfortunate circumstances. As for the Press, I'm afraid they've taken chunks. You've probably heard about the "Bigger than Celestia" comment, and that's already an uproar. Next to some strange silly filly rumor that I'm dead. Rubbish all that is."

He took a quick glance around, just in case. He had unicorn fans pop from nowhere on a couple of occasions.

"You have the advantage, you know me, but I don't know you." Yes, he did know their names by listening in, but he wasn't one to be rude.

Hymn gave a wink and a charmed grin to the pegasus mare.

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"You wouldn't happen to be one of the... oh golly... What's their..." He scratched his snout with his hoof for a brief moment. "Beat-Bugs!" He brightened considerably upon remembering their names. "Old boy, you're all over the news. I'm surprised paparazzi haven't sunk their evil nasty teeth into you yet." He looked around suspiciously. If Canterlot had no lack in anything, its nosy journalists.

Zephyr paused in her ramblings to look over a shoulder and to the stallion she helped conceal. Her orchid-colored eyes then switched to Ambriel, whom fortunately was able to clear her confusion- at least a bit. "Beat-Bug?" She rolled the name over in her mind a few times, having heard of it before. Where, however, was the question. The mare was a very active individual, leaving her little time to read the news, which the blue pegasus was apparently in. "Erm, you must forgive me, but I can't put my hoof on just what a Beat-Bug is. But I promise to read all about you- or, 'them' as it were, as soon as I can." She offered him a sincerely apologetic smile.

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"Please, not so loud, someone might hear!"

The pegasus almost jumped from his exclamation. For somepony who wanted to be discreet, he sure was going about it the wrong way. Well, he sure is becoming frantic. I wonder if we should move him to a less popular wing. As she pondered the idea, Zephyr's eyes wandered through the gallery, passing over all the stallions and mares. There were a few doorways leading into other rooms, one of which had to eventually lead to an exit- or perhaps a balcony. If we could get him to a terrace, he could simply fly off. Even if the paparazzi follows, there's plenty of buildings in Canterlot for him to lose them around.

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"I'm Hymn Hummer, its a pleasure, despite the unfortunate circumstances. As for the Press, I'm afraid they've taken chunks. You've probably heard about the "Bigger than Celestia" comment, and that's already an uproar. Next to some strange silly filly rumor that I'm dead. Rubbish all that is."

"The pleasure is all ours, I'm sure, Mr, Hummer." The mare offered him a hoof. As she did so, the purple crystal shoe of hers sparkled and gleamed. "As much as I would adore continuing this conversation, this isn't the best of places." Not to mention her wings were beginning to cramp. It wasn't that she wasn't accustomed to using them, it was more that her stunning gown weighed heavy on their attachment muscles. Nonetheless, they remained perfectly erect and their feathers fanned out for optimum cloaking.

"I'm unfamiliar with this gallery's architecture. Mr. Principatus, would you happen to know where we might find a balcony? I'm sure we could all use some fresh air, and..freedom."[/quote]

((Sorry for the long delay! shouldn’t happen again))
”Erm, you must forgive me, but I can’t put my hoof on just what a Beat-Bug is. But I promie to read all about you- or, ‘them’ as it were, as soon as I can.”

“They’re a music group.” Seraph chimed in, “I personally haven’t been following the music scene of today all that much, I’ve heard their name from a friend. Claims she met one of you fellows.” He took a few steps out of the exhibit they were currently occupying and glanced about. A long life of service under Her Majesty taught him that if anything, one must be awfully cautious. He decided that he should treat this like any other protect-and-serve operation. Constantly look for exits, an eye out for “threats.” He certainly was in no shape for any rigorous exercise, but it was always good to keep the theory in practice.

Oh who was he kidding, its been years since he took part in this sort of thing. Seraph sighed and returned to the celebrity and the lady.

”The pleasure is all ours, I’m sure, Mr. Hummer.”

While pleasantries were being exchanged. Seraph absently stared down the hall.

”I’m unfamiliar with this gallery’s architecture. Mr. PRincipatus, would you happen to know where we might find a balcony? I’m sure we could all use some fresh air, and… freedom.”

Seraph snapped to attention. “I concur, Ms. Botanica. Some fresh air does do the body good.” he pursed his lips together and ruffled his tangled blonde mane, squinting his bespectacled eyes downt he hall again. “I’m certain this building doesn’t have any balconies open to the public, but the roof supposedly holds a lovely, and quiet cafe.” He suggested brightly He pointed down the hall he was watching. "I do believe it is in this direction."

Hymn couldn't help but feel anxious, but he didn't let it show on his face. His wings gave flickers and twitches, much to his discomfort, caused by a repressed stress.

A cafe sounded nice, though.

"Let's go then," He said pleasantly, "You never quite know who'll come through the door."

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“They’re a music group.” Seraph chimed in, “I personally haven’t been following the music scene of today all that much, I’ve heard their name from a friend. Claims she met one of you fellows.”

"A music group, you say?" While she did enjoy listening to music, the type she adored came from nature. She loved listening to the chirps of birds, to the rustling of leaves as the wind blew through them. Every day, the land provided a new song- one merely had to listen. "Well, I'm impressed. It takes a lot of courage to perform before the masses." She nodded in self-agreement. "Though I see the fame it provides comes with its consequences.." Softly, she smiled, feeling a tad bit awkward at how odd the two stallions were acting.

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“I’m certain this building doesn’t have any balconies open to the public, but the roof supposedly holds a lovely, and quiet cafe.” He suggested brightly He pointed down the hall he was watching. "I do believe it is in this direction."

"Ah! That sounds perfect." Zephyr remarked. Cautiously, the mare turned to face the direction that Seraph pointed down, making sure her wings still inconspicuously covered as much as Hymn as they could. Patiently, she awaited for the unicorn to arrange himself as well, then with a breath of anticipation, she began their pleasant walk forward. With each step, her gown rippled, luxurious mane bounced, and crystal shoes clicked in the smooth marble floor. The way the pegasus presented herself with her head held high, fluffed feathers perfectly erect, eyes should be drawn in her direction (well, at least with the males), and away from the pony she protected. Hopefully.